Unmind

v/ Esther Sorgenfrei Blom

Can we be here for our own hearts?

This morning, during meditation, great restlessness and the desire to get up and move away from the cushion and the sitting filled me. 30 minutes can feel like a really long time when we suffer and are gripped by strong emotion. Attempting to let go of the storyline and return to the sensations in the body again and again. And again.

The question arose, "can I be here for my own heart, for what is in my heart this moment"? There is no relief, no solving of the situation possible. I must turn toward acceptance and holding what is to the best of my ability.

Sometimes my heart feels so big and my body so small. How can one contain the other?

So I let go into fluidity instead of being fixed, turned into water instead of ice. How uncommon that can feel to us sometimes, unusual. The challenge now, as the morning turns around the axis of my existence, is to stay tender in order to be true to myself, and at the same time carry on my daily chores.

This is what we practice.